How MENSA Improved my Mental Health

Last year, I joined MENSA.

As a joke, mostly.

But also because it was a childhood dream of the Maya who picked up that those in my intersecting social categories were often dehumanized, who realized that she was good at school, who yearned for meritocracy to be a real deciding factor in the world, and who believed that education was the path to a successful and prosperous future.

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But what if you never get better? & other small reckonings

You ever have an epiphany, forget you had it, and rerealize it?

I recently rerealized that some people who think they like me actually like who they think I would be if I magically stopped having social anxiety and became more confident. People don't like "Bad Vibes" so having a mental illness that makes you permanently a bit neurotic makes you less appealing, less attractive.

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Don't Call it A Comeback?

Hello Blog,

It’s been a while.

I take breaks from you in order to prioritize fiction, I know; and I should be writing more often. I actually have the rest of my current novel’s plot arc beside me on a small handheld notebook page.

I take breaks from you in order to write things that I sell, yes, but sometimes I want to write for free, for myself. I do plan to detonate this website if I get published for kids, or at least develop some other place the <18s can find and research me.

I take breaks from you from in fear that my students may look me up and judge me for sharing all my Queer Black Geek traumas. I’m a grad student now, a TA.

I’ve also been assuming that nobody reads this blog. Sure, people have reached out through my contact form, but nobody reads my blog.

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